20 Funniest Simpson Quotes

They hit the silver screen, and got some of us addicted to the series, here's to remember the best quotes in Simpsons television history.

1. Homer: I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.
2. Comic Book Guy: Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.
3. Homer: Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love!
4. Homer: Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.
5. Homer: Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me?
6. Homer: Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
7. Homer: How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
8. Grandpa Simpson: Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot.
9. Homer: Old people don’t need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
10. Homer: A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice.
11. Homer: Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!
12. Mr. Burns: I’ll keep it short and sweet — Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
13. Mr. Burns: What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man?
14. Homer: Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?
15. Frink: Brace yourselves gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is… Love!? Who’s been screwing with this thing?
16. Apu: Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I work, I work.
17. Milhouse: We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.
18. Homer: I’m going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won’t be back for ten minutes!
19. Smithers: I’m allergic to bee stings. They cause me to, uh, die.
20. Bill Gates: I didn’t get rich by signing checks.